Hormones are the Devil
I hate hormones. They invade your life and screw with it just for the hell of it. I'm usually really good around the time when they start to creep up on me, at least I think i'm pretty good. Maybe we should ask my husband because I feel like he would have a very different answer ;)
Today I found myself extremely emotional and I honestly wasn't expecting it. I seem to go from happy to extremely frustrated in the blink of an eye and to be honest, it's exhausting. Like for example, today I was looking up apartments to rent for Cam and I, and I found some that looked very promising; specious and enough bedrooms to house the little one we hope will come soon. I was so excited that I found something that not only fit our budget but actually looked nice as well. But then I called to see when we could come and see the apartment. Now here lies the problem: Cam works on weekends. I have a regular "9-5" job but Cam is in car sales, so he works odd hours and that includes every Saturday. I don't know why I got so frustrated with this today, it has been this way for the past 4 years, so I should expect it. But nevertheless I was ranting to him about how unfair it is that we can't seem to find time to actually go and see these places, and how are we ever going to move when our schedules interfere with actually choosing somewhere to live. Crazy right? Obviously we will find a place, and obviously we will make it work, but to me this feat seemed impossible and something that was so unattainable that I got so frustrated and stressed about something so minor. But Cam being the ever calm presence in my life, texted me back and reassured me that everything will
work itself out one way or another. Am I still on edge about the whole moving scenario, yes of course. I am a woman and I will worry until we actually move into an apartment and get settled. But as of right now I think I have calmed my frustrations to a dull roar, so Cam should be fine when he comes home :)
But thank god for Cam because he is an amazing support system for me. I honestly do not know where I would be today without him in my life. He has not only been there for me through all this fertility craziness but through every obstacles that seems to come my way. During University when I was going through finals and my Dad got sick, he would come down during the week and spend time with me because I was pretty much all alone with my Mom always at the hospital. Then there was the task of getting me a job after I graduated. I went through 2 internships, one unpaid and one paid (thank god) and he was supportive through all of that. He always told me to do whatever made me happy, and I honestly think he is the only reason I got through those 2 years. Then there was the year I lost my job and was unemployed for 10 months. This was the hardest months for us because it happened during our first year of marriage and I had almost no money coming in, and he was supporting both of us. I knew it was stressing him out, and I knew he was worried about money and what we would do if I didn't find a job soon. But he never let me know just how stressed he was, and I thank him for that. It was definitely not what I needed at the time and I love him so much for protecting me from that all those months.
Cam is my rock, and although our relationship has had its up and downs over the past 6 years I can't see myself with anyone else. I know I picked the right person to spend the rest of my life with, and I know he is going to be the best father to our kids and I am so happy to have him on my side.
Until next time,
~Siobhan~
Today I found myself extremely emotional and I honestly wasn't expecting it. I seem to go from happy to extremely frustrated in the blink of an eye and to be honest, it's exhausting. Like for example, today I was looking up apartments to rent for Cam and I, and I found some that looked very promising; specious and enough bedrooms to house the little one we hope will come soon. I was so excited that I found something that not only fit our budget but actually looked nice as well. But then I called to see when we could come and see the apartment. Now here lies the problem: Cam works on weekends. I have a regular "9-5" job but Cam is in car sales, so he works odd hours and that includes every Saturday. I don't know why I got so frustrated with this today, it has been this way for the past 4 years, so I should expect it. But nevertheless I was ranting to him about how unfair it is that we can't seem to find time to actually go and see these places, and how are we ever going to move when our schedules interfere with actually choosing somewhere to live. Crazy right? Obviously we will find a place, and obviously we will make it work, but to me this feat seemed impossible and something that was so unattainable that I got so frustrated and stressed about something so minor. But Cam being the ever calm presence in my life, texted me back and reassured me that everything will
But thank god for Cam because he is an amazing support system for me. I honestly do not know where I would be today without him in my life. He has not only been there for me through all this fertility craziness but through every obstacles that seems to come my way. During University when I was going through finals and my Dad got sick, he would come down during the week and spend time with me because I was pretty much all alone with my Mom always at the hospital. Then there was the task of getting me a job after I graduated. I went through 2 internships, one unpaid and one paid (thank god) and he was supportive through all of that. He always told me to do whatever made me happy, and I honestly think he is the only reason I got through those 2 years. Then there was the year I lost my job and was unemployed for 10 months. This was the hardest months for us because it happened during our first year of marriage and I had almost no money coming in, and he was supporting both of us. I knew it was stressing him out, and I knew he was worried about money and what we would do if I didn't find a job soon. But he never let me know just how stressed he was, and I thank him for that. It was definitely not what I needed at the time and I love him so much for protecting me from that all those months.
Cam is my rock, and although our relationship has had its up and downs over the past 6 years I can't see myself with anyone else. I know I picked the right person to spend the rest of my life with, and I know he is going to be the best father to our kids and I am so happy to have him on my side.
Until next time,
~Siobhan~
Comments
Post a Comment